Through All The Ups And Downs, You Are The Only Constant.

Another round of life in 366 days have passed. It is officially the beginning of another new year, a brand new chapter added to our book of living, as long as we are currently still breathing. If people were to asked me, how has 2024 been for me? I would say it is not a bad year yet it is also not a good one. Perhaps, it is because it is a year where I realized I am no longer a teenager with the age that I turned. I was panicking most of the times because I realized how fast times do really passed by. One moment, I was a freshman in university where I didn’t know much about my university, the next moment, I am now a second year student, having to guide my juniors with the knowledge I gained from my seniors. It feels like it was just yesterday I cut my birthday cake, now I am eating the leftovers from our Christmas’ cake.

Not much has happened in the year 2024, but the things that did happened, left several impacts in my life. Some gave me the joy of happiness, some left me with bruises from sadness. There are moments where I feel like I am at the peak of life where nothing could not upset me, there are also moments where I feel so small and tiny, I feel like I am at lowest point of life where life controlled me like a puppet instead of I am controlling my own self. Most of the times, I feel like I am just in the middle of this wheel of life, spinning around, without anything to enjoy or to be upset about it. However, throughout all these ups and downs, you are the only constant.

Through every twists and turns, bumpy and smooth roads, or the low and high tides, you are the only thing that is steady. You are the only thing that keep me sane. You are the only element of life that I could grip and hold onto, so I have something to always bounce back and stand up every time I fall. As silly as it sounds to other people, you are the main reason I am able to love the fact that I still can take a breathe every morning I wake up, and for your existence, in every writings I have written about you, in every statements I mentioned about you, and in every unconscious thoughts I shared about you, I always thank God for creating you.

The real you, the one behind the screens and cameras of many, is someone I may not know anything about. However, the you that appears in front of us, in front of me, is someone I love everything about. If loving someone a thousand miles away is the only healthy way to keep me sane from the ever busy world, I’d rather consume every bits of you rather than taking pills I might end up being addicted to. Although everyone shakes their head every time I say how much I adore you, I can’t help myself to continue hanging and gripping onto your existence. For as long as I have known you, you have been nothing but a blissful remedy to me.

I hope you achieve everything you want in life, including all the ambitions you never speak outloud. I hope you remain steady and stable, through multiple storms that might come in the future. I hope you continue to be yourself, for as much as I love the you that exists in front of us, I hope you never lose the person that you truly are in hopes to please everyone who has supported you. Mostly, I hope you give yourself a rest, simply just to eat, sleep, binge watching your favourite shows or play the latest video games well.

Earlier in 2024, I wish for the world to be kinder to you because you have been nothing but kind enough for the world and for everything in it. This year, I would love for you to be kind to yourself. You don’t have to care about what the world has got to say about you, I just hope you put yourself first before anything or anyone else. For another new year, you and me, I hope we continue to look out for each other in ways only you, me and the God above know.

Happy new year, Haechan Lee. May you continue to be the good person I will always hold close to my heart to. My love for you remains the same, as always.

For Lee Haechan,

written by C, 01012025.